Friday, November 10, 2006

Old Bitter Ladies Suck!

Dear Pinch-faced, bitchy, Hallmark Lady,
I am very sorry that I interrupted your "very important" conversation with your friend about that lady in your church, but my three-year-old really had to go pee. I mean really, really had to pee. We were way past the potty dance phase and in the flat out hold your crotch and whimper phase.
You see she's three, and just learning how to use the potty, and doesn't always remember to tell adults when she needs to go. Would it have killed you to let her go in the back and pee? The answer is no it wouldn't!
I hope you are aware that there is a special place in hell for evil bitches that don't let kids use the bathroom. A place where you will be plagued by a hopelessly full bladder and a bunch of tight-ass bitches that won't let you pee. Too bad you didn't have a heart and let my daughter go.
I bet if I had been there in full soccer mom regalia, with my cardigans and pearls you would have let my daughter use your potty. Well the jokes on you old Biddie! I was there shopping for work. I had to buy all sorts of Hallmarky crap (like guest books, etc.) for the dedication ceremony at my work. I may not look like I have tons of money but I had the backing of a very healthy budget and you blew it all. I'll head on out to Tuscola and do my business there.
And in the future, I'll just pull my daughter's pants down and let her pee on your floor!
The Mom who yelled at you as she ran her daughter over to Wal-Mart!


La Sirena said...

You have cardigans and pearls?

Mean old hag, making Rory hold it!!!

Woodlandmama said...

I have ONE cardigan, that I never wear, and Rory has her add-a-pearl necklace. T-shirts and jeans are how I roll,even if i were a millionairess. It's not like she was working at a high class shop, Hallmark sucks!

Jenny said...

Oh hell yes! I'll go pee on the floor too if you tell me the address.

Obviously she's never had to potty-train a kid before.

Woodlandmama said...

For sure, we can be like those moms that went and group breast fed at that airport, only will be peeing, it'll rock!