Thursday, September 4, 2008

The Evolution of My Purse

You know that in One Fine Day (come on if I saw it so did you) where Michelle Pfeiffer makes costumes for the two kids with shit from her purse? I've become that mom.

Some things you should know about me. I don't wear make-up, maybe a little bit of lipstick but rarely, and mostly it's Burt's Bees lipstick because it makes my lips feel tingly. I sometimes put it on like I'm going to wear it, then think I look silly and wipe it all off. I wore make-up when I was my BFF's Maid of Honor (because she paid to have my make-up done) and I wore make-up to my wedding (because my mom paid for me to have it done). Anytime I look at pictures of me from then, the make-up is all I can see.

The point is, I am mostly a wallet in my pockets kind of girl. I enjoyed having diaper bags, and for several years I had a small backpack (until it was stolen), but I tend to lose purses so I never wanted one. Slowly, however, I've been converted.

I started carrying a purse more when I got my iPod. A cell phone, a wallet, keys, and an iPhone were way to much for my pockets. So I started using a small purse. Then I got a Palm Pilot and my purses got a little bigger. I also got a couple so that they'd be a little matchy. Then I saw this red one that I liked. It reminded me of Wonder Woman's boots. So even though it was way bigger than any purse I'd ever had (but still quite small compared to most women's purses) I bought it.

One day, for some reason or another, I stuck a notepad in my purse (I already had two pens and a pencil for unimportant reasons). That day while we were waiting for something or another Girl was bored and I pulled out the notepad and enjoyed a stress-free waiting period while she drew. So I started to carry more stuff in my purse to entertain her.

One day, Girl and Boy were talking about how they loved riding in Daddy's car because he always had gum in it. So I tossed in some gum and butterscotch (because I always have to be the favorite).

We went somewhere and Girl's pants kept falling down, so I tossed in some safety pins. At Boy's swim meets we were supposed to write their events on their arms in Sharpie. I kept forgetting it so I put one in my purse. On and on it went. Yesterday, I was changing to a different purse and this is what I discovered:

My wallet (with wallety things)
2 Checkbooks
Tide to Go
Wet Ones single packs
A little mini-thing of standard size bandaids
two knee-sized bandaids
two pens
a sharpie
a pencil
five dice
a glue stick
Jr. Strength Tylenol
Children's Benedryl
Adult Benedryl
Hand Sanitizer (a generic kind)
Listerine strips
small bandaids
antiseptic wipes
rubber gloves
safety pins of all sizes
measuring tape
eyeglass screws and screwdriver
pack of old maid cards
pack of regular cards
binder clips
rubber gloves
plastic sandwich bags
sugarless Butterscotch
Carmex lip balm
Lip Smackers Cherry 7up lip balm
nail file
YMCA membership card on lanyard
five small cars
$10 in quarters
two notepads (one lined one unlined)
Palm Pilot
brush with several hairbands on the handle.
and finally two extra batteries for my camera.

The truth is, I've used everything since I put it in my purse. Also, my purse isn't as messy and you'd think I keep the littler stuff in a pencil case and two travel pill box things I found at Walmart.

Now, what's in your purse?


Sayre said...

That's not a purse - it's a suitcase! That said, I have been guilty of carrying just in case stuff around with me. Now I carry it in my car because I was having shoulder pain from carrying such a load!

Woodlandmama said...

Now, I won't even begin to talk about the contents of my car. That's TOO embarassing!